This past weekend, my wife and I were in the mood for a good romantic comedy. Netflix had just released what appeared to be another Hallmark-like rom-com, My Oxford Year. To our surprise, it proved to be more of a tearjerker than an emotionally satisfying feel-good experience. 

It was also a perfect example of the woefully bankrupt values of a secular worldview. More about that in a minute.

Note to self: Netflix romantic movies usually lack true romance.

Note to others:  Spoiler alert, the following comments will reveal the ending.

The typical romantic movie is almost always formulaic, featuring a predictable plot, charming characters, and a happy ending. It examines the complexities of human relationships, and viewers become engaged with the ups and downs of the characters and story. The characters ultimately find love. When well-developed, such stories subtly reveal the innate God-given need for love and connection.

Unfortunately, Netflix rom-coms take a Hallmark-like plot and spice it up with sex.  My Oxford Year was no exception.

The protagonist, Anna, a Latina from New York, is accepted to spend a year studying Victorian poetry at Oxford. Her plans are set —  enjoy the year at Oxford and then return to New York for a job at Goldman Sachs. However, her life takes an unexpected turn when she meets and initially clashes with Mr. Spontaneous, live-for-the-moment Jaime.

They soon fall into lust and jump into bed (or the back of a car) whenever the urge to have sex overwhelms them, which happens quite often. Jaime reminds Anna that this is “just for fun.” Knowing she plans to return to New York at the end of the school year, she agrees. This is “just for fun.”

Movies with plots like this often reveal, without realizing it, an eternal, universal truth. There is a bonding aspect to sex. Despite their agreement, Anna and Jaime quickly fall in love. But Jaime has a secret. He is dying. Knowing his life is fading due to a rare genetic condition, his philosophy of life is to live in the moment. He finds meaning by enjoying unexpected encounters and experiences. Sex for him is “just fun.” 

As their relationship develops, their conversations are often sprinkled with philosophical catchphrases like, “The best parts of life are the messy bits.” or “Just because something is fleeting doesn’t mean it’s not meaningful.” These empty euphemisms are their way of justifying their life choices in this live-life-to-the-fullest melodrama of life.

Faith or religion plays no part in Jaime’s response to living and dying.  To him, there is no inherent meaning or purpose beyond human experience. “I Did It My Way” could be his theme song.

Allow me to interject a personal note to explain my reaction to this secular approach to dealing with love and loss.

I lost my late wife to cancer in 2011.  Her journey through her own valley of the shadow lasted but a few months.  As painful as that journey was, her Christian faith is what brought comfort and hope.  She found meaning in life being a daughter of God and living a life that reflected His love and teachings. Being a Christ-follower guided her life and comforted her in death.  

My journey through the valley of tears faced despair and an overwhelming sense of loss. My relationship with Christ helped me navigate this minefield of emotions.  The Christian worldview, I discovered, offers something a secular worldview cannot.  Hope.

Watching My Oxford Year was a stark reminder of how the secular world views meaning and purpose in life.  Were there positive aspects to this movie?  Sure. Superficially, one might find some encouragement from the importance of cherishing moments in time and living life intentionally. But the deeper message is pure secular propaganda.

• Sex is ok with anyone at any time.  
• Morality is derived from human experience.
• Meaning in life is only found in living in the moment.
• One creates their own meaning; there is no inherent meaning or purpose beyond human experience.

This tearjerker of a movie ends with Jaime dying and Anna reconsidering her career choices.

This love story lacked a godly influence and perspective. Instead, Anna and Jaime based their love on feelings. Their means of coping with death left me feeling empty and devoid of hope.

No hope of Jaime going home to the loving arms of our Lord.

No hope of his being pain-free.

No hope of Anna’s future as a daughter of God, who would ease her pain and loss by finding comfort in her faith and gratitude for the gift Jaime was to her.

No hope beyond death.

If there is any value in watching this current film, it should be seen as an opportunity to evaluate worldviews. I found myself asking, what are the underlying assumptions and messages about life depicted in this storyline? In the face of grief and loss, 

• Which worldview offers hope and healing?
• How does one find meaning in suffering?
• Is sexual freedom really freeing?
• How do we discern our unique calling?
• Is the ultimate outcome of a secular worldview anything other than despair?

Throughout the movie, there were breathtaking views of Oxford University. This centuries-old institution, whose architecture radiates its Christian roots, serves as the backdrop for this faithless, bittersweet romance. As the characters lacked commitment to each other and God, my wife and I kept waiting for that to change.  But it never did.  I couldn’t help but wonder, what would Oxford alumni like C.S. Lewis and J.R.R. Tolkien think of this film’s unfulfilling message?

I suspect they would be offended by how platitudes from centuries-old poetry are used to justify a live-for-the-moment lifestyle, especially when facing death.

“Just for fun,” they would say, is not a fulfilling philosophy for life.

Maybe that’s why the movie left my wife and me feeling hopeless and empty.